Cancel all of your plans, you can grow your own loofahs.

This morning I was just enjoying a nice piece of breakfast cake when I was informed that a loofah is just DRIED SQUASH.

I will be the first to admit, I don't know how a lot of things are made. And it is really fun to experiment with zero-waste creations like lip-balm, deodorant, and dish detergent. A lot of products are actually way more simple than you might imagine.

Anyway, if you forced me into guessing, I would have said a loofah is made from some knitted fabrics or something??? I honestly had no concept of where they came from.

But to find out that they aren't manufactured at all and that they are just a dried vegetable?! WELL, I have been instantly enthralled with visions of becoming a loofah farmer. It is true that most of my life aspirations play out with me surfing under the sun on some remote island. However, I cannot deny that loofas have game-changing qualities.

I now think of a future where I own a pig named Ravioli who wakes up with me at dawn to till the soil. I picture myself leaning on a fence, admiring my millions of squash at full bloom, sprawling out under the blazing Michigan sun.

If you have similar dreams of becoming a loofah farming billionaire, here is a step-by-step guide:

And for those of you curious onlookers who are hesitant to delve into farming but would like to know how a squash turns into a loofah, check this out:

Here is the squash Luffa aegyptiaca or Luffa acutangular.

You can purchase seeds online or in gardening retailers as well.

Photo via: Good Housekeeping

Once they have fully grown (and before they are overly ripe), pick the squash.

You will then peel off the outer skin to reveal:

You really can't get any more natural or eco-friendly than that. So ditch those Dollar Tree loofahs and opt for the OG, homegrown exfoliator.

I have to go prep the fields for planting season but if you want me to send you a loofah around June time, let me know!

In the meantime, here are 3 dollar loofahs from Etsy. Etsy also offsets all carbon emissions from shipping.

Happy farming!


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